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The veil is thin at first, while innocence still lingers, and we long for the peace of what lies behind its gossamer threads while we face the life we have just been given. We start life and within seconds our canvas is already stained with blood and tears, love and pain, worry, relief, joy, sorrow & fear. Positive or negative, it is etched in the canvas of who we are and our becoming. Stop making excuses.Įvery experience in our lives leaves a mark. Happiness and health and peace are choices. We chose! If you want to live a different life, follow a different path, then get off your ass and do it.
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Nobody can predict when or how our lives will end, and nobody can tell us how to live them while we are here. Take control of your life, your future, your destiny. Whatever your challenge, whatever you face, don't let others dictate your fate. Not me.ĭay 1 of year 3? First day of the rest of my life. I will not lay down and die just because that's what the medical community diagnosed. I am strengthening my heart and lungs and working to make the most of them. I eat right, I go to the gym five days a week, I move all the time.
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I was sedentary, inactive, full of unhealthy choices. 3-5 is what they said when they diagnosed my secondary PHT following my acute PE resulting in 22 blood clots 2 years ago. It's a pivotal day in some ways, but mostly it will be like any other. October 8th will trigger the first day of the rest of my life. Each one new and exciting and worth the effort. Sometimes, I falter, but most days.most days are like finding buried treasure every day. I learned to feel it all, to let it all in, and to absorb it. Every up and down, every nuance, every tear, every giggle, every smile, every fret.
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I learned the value of life and I learned how much I wanted to live. On October 7th nearly two years ago I learned my lesson. I know the importance of cherishing every moment, every second we have. Most days I know! Life is a gift and I know it better than most! I know how quickly and unexpectedly it can be ripped away without warning. Somewhere off in the distance a plane is taking off full of passengers destined for faraway places. To hear the quiet of the morning, the sounds of the pups stirring, Jeff lying beside me breathing deeply, still lost in a dream. Sometimes I wake up and I forget how lucky I am for the simple luxury of opening my eyes to see the first light of day. Not a moment passes that I don't realize the power of life and death, and not a moment passes that I am not in absolute terror and ultimate peace in parallel.Īnother Thanksgiving comes and goes and the holidays follow close behind and I am blessed ever and always to be a part of them. It is beautiful and heart wrenching, soothing and thought provoking, stirring and calming, it is complex and easy. I am thankful for the ever evolving fine artwork that is my life. The threads are so interwoven and masterfully crafted to design the life I live, that to pluck at one and pull at it would create a snag difficult for the finest seamstress to darn back together. I feel the same about many people in my life. To hone in on simply calling them my children does not remotely begin to cover the gratitude and overwhelming sense of awestruck that floods over me when I think of them. How they came to be what they will become all the lives they will touch the picture is vast. I am not simply grateful for my children, but for the gift of motherhood for who they are for their presence their compassion the spirits they house within their core for all they are and ever will be. The task itself forces us to call out and minimize the importance of the greater picture. It has become tradition in social media to spend a month stating things we are grateful for, but that seems like such a waste to me, and almost pejorative. I know how lucky I am to have what I do (the people, my job, each healthy day, a home, and all the things we don't think about until they are gone) and I never let a day begin or end without expressing my gratitude for where I fit in to it all. I'm thankful not just on Thanksgiving but all year round.
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